An Uncommon Love: How We Met and Decided to Marry In 6 Days

An Uncommon Love - How We Met and Decided to Marry in Six Days

His suggestion came as quite a surprise.

But I didn’t really know what to expect.

We were back east visiting our son who was attending a college there.

It was his first year and our first visit.

Our first son.

A number of firsts.

I’m not saying I was nervous – just that I didn’t know what it would be like.  Wasn’t sure what he would think of us now  . . . or what his friends would make of us.  Wasn’t sure how it would all go.

He’d already been at the college for a couple of months, but for me it felt as though the first day of school.

So that’s why his proposed idea came as something of a surprise.

How about if you and dad tell how the two of you met? You know, shared your love story with my friends?

Our son went on to explain that he’d sent out an email to a bunch of his friends around campus inviting them to join us at the lunch table in the cafeteria.

He was gathering his group together because he hoped his parents would tell how they first met.

“Really…? Do you really think they’ll want to hear it?”

Oh, yeah, Mom.  Everyone loves a good love story. 

And I suppose they do.

But I never imagined sharing ours with our college-aged son and his buddies.

That was a surprise.

Our Love Story - How We Met and Decided to Marry in Six Days

*Our son (far right) and some of his friends from college

An Uncommon Love: How We Met and Decided to Marry in Six Days

Matthew and I have shared our story many times over the years. 

Late into the evening with old friends. Over a cup of coffee with new friends.  At a Valentine’s Banquet. With singles who needed encouragement. With couples who could use a good laugh. And with our son’s college friends across the country.

We always tell our story together—him and me.

I think it’s mostly because he doesn’t really tell it right. He gets people to take his side in the story, but that’s just not fair. So I have to get my word in there too (and I’m already counting on you to take my part in this, okay?). I wouldn’t want you to get the wrong impression!

Maybe it’s not all that unusual of a story.

Single girl meets single guy.

Starts with a letter.

Ends with a kiss.

Just another love story.

Except maybe for the part where we decided to marry six days after we met.

And that we’ve been loving each other ever since.

Maybe that’s not quite so typical.

Uncommon. 

An Uncommon Love - A True Life Love Story by Matthew and Lisa Jacobson

NEW Series beginning next week: An Uncommon Love

An Uncommon Love.

Yeah, that’s what he called it. And I always liked the way that sounded.  So that’s what I’ve called it too.

And that’s the story we’re going to be sharing over the next few weeks.  Him and me.

About how we knew we wanted to get married only six days after our first date.

And how before that, I declared that I wouldn’t go out with him “If he was the last man on earth”. Yet somehow ended up in his arms in the end.

It’s a  story about an ordinary guy and an ordinary girl.  A story about falling in love.

About insecurities, miscommunications, self-doubts, wonder and a kiss.

Two people looking for love and waiting on God.

In true life.

An Uncommon Love - Matthew and Lisa Jacobson

An Uncommon Love: A True-Life Love Story by Matthew and Lisa Jacobson.

Starting next week, we’ll both be telling our story. But he said I could go first . . .

Chapter One: If He Was the Last Man On Earth

Doesn’t sound like it has a very promising beginning, does it? Don’t worry. It gets better.

I’ll tell you all about it . . .!

*Please share this with any friends or family who might enjoy this story too!

**And now for fun –  how did you and your husband meet? Where were you when you first saw each other? Do tell….!

In His grace,
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100 Ways to Love Your Husband by Lisa Jacobson and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife by Matthew L Jacobson *If you would like these posts delivered directly to your inbox, simply subscribe below (and get the FREE eBook, The 7 Habits of a Highly Fulfilling Marriage).

Why Not Build a Lasting Friendship in Your Marriage? {& Book and Journal Giveaway}

A Marriage Without Friendship is Like a Bird Without Wings

It is when we are doing things together that friendship springs up – painting, sailing ships, praying, philosophizing, and fighting shoulder to shoulder. Friends look in the same direction. – C.S. Lewis

Let’s talk about the old days.

The days before “we” when it was just “you and he.” Back to the foundation of friendship where a seed of romance was planted and watered until it took root.

Remember those days?

What was it like to be new-found friends? How was life different?

Michael and I were friends for several months before we dated. Not your regular run of the mill friendship, where we met for coffee every other week no, like most young couples, we were inseparable buddies. We spent hours on end talking on the phone about the music we enjoyed, the movies that made us cry, friends from the past… and more than anything else–we laughed.

We went for picnics, attended church, and spent time at the park. Taking long walks I’d feel the brush of his hand against mine wondering when and if they’d ever connect.

Like any new and exciting friendship I was sincerely interested in knowing what he was about, so I asked questions and listened intently to every word that he spoke and every story he told. There was no doubt in my mind that this man was my very best friend. We made every effort to spend time together.

Fast forward about 15 years… Michael and I were struggling with the day to day details of starting a new business. We were dealing with the loss of five babies to miscarriage, and had started raising a family. Michael was working long hours and I was busy at home taking care of the babies.

Unfortunately, like many couples who are busy being Mom and Dad, our friendship was swept to the side for a time. Thankfully we’ve made an effort to pull friendship back to the forefront of our relationship.

If you’re wondering what that looks like, it’s a matter of carving out time to spend in each other’s company, and enjoying the time that you have.

Alone time? That’s good, but not always practical when you have a house full of kids. Spending time with your husband might be putting a puzzle together on the kitchen table, watching a Lord of the Rings Marathon (which I recently did), or enjoying a picnic with your kids at the park.

As much as I want to suggest “date nights” to you, I’m going to veer in a slightly different direction today by sharing two romantic little nuggets with you:

My parents were married for 60 years, and I don’t ever remember them going out on a “date.” It just wasn’t their thing. They had a big family and they were careful about the way that they spent their money.

But here’s what I did notice about them… aside from watching TV and gardening together, they spent time laughing together. Looking back at it now, the one thing that I loved most about spending time at the cabin was the fact that the walls were thin and I could hear my parents chatting and laughing in bed. They would giggle and talk for a good half hour before falling asleep.

Then this afternoon I had lunch with a couple that’s been happily married for over 30 years.

Do you want to know how they spend their evenings together? He reads classic novels to her while she works in the kitchen.

I asked, “How many has he read to you? She said, “Hmm… let me think… how long have we been married?” (My heart just about melted when I heard that one!)

Date nights don’t get much better than that, do they?

The bottom line is that friends don’t only enjoy each other’s company, they make an effort to do so.

Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth.” ~ Proverbs 5:18

Darlene SchachtDarlene Schacht is the well-known Time Warp Wife whose purpose in ministry is to encourage wives to put God first in their lives. She inspires us to love our husbands and children, and to be good homemakers.

Darlene is an Evangelical Christian who has been married to her husband Michael for over twenty-five years. They have four children and two adorable pugs. Their lives are basically surrounded by three things: faith, family, and books.

Her newest book, Messy Beautiful Love: Hope and Redemption for Real-Life Marriages (Thomas Nelson), delivers an incredible testimony of grace that offers hope for today’s marriages and a spark for rekindling love. Visit Darlene’s website at: www.TimeWarpWife.com

(This post may contain affiliate links. Read my full disclosure.)
Messy, Beautiful Love and Journal by Darlene Schacht

And now I’m excited to announce the release of Darlene Schacht’s new book, Messy Beautiful Love: Hope and Redemption for Real-Life Marriages!

I’ll never forget first reading Darlene’s story on her blog and walking upstairs to my husband’s office to share it with him. I didn’t even know Darlene yet, but I was moved to tears by her testimony. He listened to me read her words and was equally touched by her messy, beautiful love story. That was the beginning of one of those wonderful ways God moves and connects lives.  Matthew became Darlene’s literary agent and a few short months later, she had a signed contract with Thomas Nelson. You can read more about that part of the story here: How to Land a Literary agent and Get Your Book Published.

You can purchase Darlene’s book Messy, Beautiful Love HERE 

Or you can enter to win one of two copies of her book, as well as this lovely journal below!
a Rafflecopter giveaway

Blessings and enjoy!
In His grace,
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100 Ways to Love Your Husband by Lisa Jacobson and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife by Matthew L Jacobson
*If you would like these posts delivered directly to your inbox, simply subscribe below (and get the FREE eBook, The 7 Habits of a Highly Fulfilling Marriage).

The Power of Grace to Hold Your Marriage Together

Embrace Your Marriage - The Power of Grace to Hold Your Marriage Together

So strange.

So strange that it would be one of the first things they told us.

Stranger still, perhaps, that this is what continues to stand out in my mind. Out of all the things that the doctors at the hospital shared with us, that this statement would be the most memorable.

“Most parents who give birth to this kind of child end up in divorce. We just thought we should prepare you for that.”

Yeah, thanks.

It was like hearing two pieces of devastating news.

As if one wasn’t enough.

The first news was that our sweet baby had suffered a massive stroke before she was even born. She would likely never walk, talk, or know us as her parents – if she lived at all.

The second was that our marriage would not likely endure the tragedy of it all.

More news than a couple should have to take in at one time, wouldn’t you say?

Basically, “This is the beginning of the end.”

I glanced over at my husband with desperate grief and fear in my eyes.

But he wasn’t having any of it.

No way, Babe. We’re not going to take the “likely” path, you and me.

We serve the God who continually surprises us with the unlikely. The God of miracles. The Restorer. The Redeemer.

And He is more than able to hold us together.

So how did we get through the years that followed? Those pressure-filled, emotionally, physically, and financially draining years?

The grace of God.

Grace from Him and grace for each other.

And you can cling to that same grace as well—in both the good times and hard times.

Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. ~ Heb. 4:16

The Power of Grace to Hold Your Marriage Together

Grace that offers compassion. When the other person is weak. Sometimes I was too tired to see straight. Or even talk sweet.  He overlooked that snap because he knew I wasn’t “myself” from fatigue and worry.  And I tried to do the same for him.

Grace that doesn’t keep a grudge. He said things that hurt my feelings or made me feel like he didn’t really understand. He let me down and didn’t always hold up. And it was the same here. But we knew we needed to let it go and not let bitterness settle in.

Grace that goes the extra mile. At times each of us had to give more than we had—and certainly more than “our fair share”. We couldn’t keep records or simply take turns. We had to learn to give . . . and then give some more.

Grace that accepts the gift of others.  Grace also comes in the form of support from friends and family. We can’t do this by ourselves, but recognize that we are needy. We are part of the body of Christ for a reason and were never meant to walk alone (More here: On Why It Is So Critical To Connect With Friends).

Grace that doesn’t give up.  No matter how dark some days were – and especially the nights – we refused to give up. We believed God had us in His hands, even when the situation seemed impossible. You are in those same loving Hands.

The Power of Grace to Hold Your Marriage Together - Embrace Your Marriage

So, yes, our marriage held together. By God’s grace, we will be celebrating twenty-two years this Friday!

Grace to Hold Your Marriage TogetherAnd if you’re wondering what happened to that dear little girl of ours?

She is a miracle. While it’s true she never did learn to walk, she can definitely talk…and talk. She calls me mommy and says how much she loves me.

She prays for us and for this blog. Every day.

And so in a very real sense, she prays for you too. All because of unlikely grace. Powerful grace. 

The same grace that  is available to you too.

But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which He loved us,even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved—and raised us up with Him and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages He might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. ~ Eph. 2:4-7

CHALLENGE: Before you can extend grace to others, the best place to start is with the preparation of a pure and tender heart. Pray, asking God for wisdom and guidance in this area. Think of how God’s grace has impacted your life, and acknowledge the areas where you have been forgiven.

Embrace Your Marriage - A Virtual Marriage Retreat

Every Monday in September, these five bloggers and I will be offering a word of wisdom and inspiration to encourage you in your marriage. I hope you’ll hop over see each one of them!

And here’s what you have to look forward to . . . .

  • September 1 – Embracing Grace 
  • September 8th – Embracing Change  
  • September 15th – Embracing Your Differences  
  • September 22nd – Embracing Unity 
  • September 29th – Embracing Friendship 

So mark your calendar and join us each week as we all share on these very important topics in marriage. And be sure and invite any friends who might be blessed by this event as well.

Looking forward to seeing you on Mondays!

In His grace,
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100 Ways to Love Your Husband by Lisa Jacobson and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife by Matthew L Jacobson

On Why It’s So Critical That We Connect With Friends

On Why It's So Critical That We Connect With Friends

No one ever thought it would happen.

Least of all her.

She was a pastor’s wife and a homeschooling mom. A lovely lady with four beautiful children.

And now it’s completely fallen apart.

Heartbreak, divorce, and she’s left them all.

Not that everything was perfect because it wasn’t.

But what actually happened? Something went wrong somewhere.

Left her family behind – bewildered and searching for answers.

What would have made a difference? And what would have helped? These are the some of the questions we’ve all agonized over.

The answer isn’t simple and I don’t pretend it to be. But there is one thing that I’m certain would have helped.  Might have even changed the course of this family’s history.

And that one thing is pressed upon my heart today.

A close friend.

I believe a good friend could have helped tremendously in that situation. Possibly turned it around.

Because when you’re left alone with your own thoughts and your own struggles? Your own pain and your own sin and weakness? As well as the the pain and sin of those around you?

It’s easy to get confused and off-track. To spiral downward. To listen to those negative, destructive voices.

And this is right where the Enemy wants you to be.

Which is why Christ urges us – commands us, really – that we are to love one another.  Deeply.  Fervently.

This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. ~ John 15:12-13

We are made to walk closely with one another.

Not alone.

Yet so many of you have written me telling me how lonely you are and how your heart aches for someone to understand and care about you.

And I get it. I really do.

It is increasingly difficult to find friends in this busy, fragmented world we live in. Friendship is risky and it’s rare. And yet  I believe it’s essential for us as believers to be walking closely with others.

We need each other, sisters. 

Why It's So Critical to Connect With Friends

How Do You Closely Connect with True Friends?

Pray for friends. I’ve found over the years that I’ve had to pray for friends. Ask God to bring women in your life who will love you. Support and challenge you.  As iron sharpens iron (Prov. 27:17).

Reach out. Don’t wait for someone else to make the first move. Swallow your fears and your insecurities and take a chance. Some of my closest friendships came out of my shy and hesitant, “Hi, I’m Lisa and I was wondering…..?”

Get creative. Don’t limit yourself to your small circles, but be willing to seek out friends from various places and stages in life. Some of my friends are local and some live all over the world. Some are older and others are younger than me. Each has something unique to offer in friendship.

Share openly. Be real with a few trusted friends – using discretion – and be willing to be honest and vulnerable. Feels risky, I know, but it’s a risk worth taking. God doesn’t want us to live in the shadows, but to walk out into the light.

Speak truth. I am grateful for friends who are willing to speak truth into my life. Sometimes we can be so hesitant about “hurting” a friend –  that we hurt them worse by not being willing to be honest with them.  So let’s lovingly, graciously, speak truth to each other too.

Communicate love. True friendship takes both time and effort. Show your friends by your words and by your actions that you love and care for them. Yes, pour into your family, but invest in good friendships too—friendships that will encourage you in your spiritual walk and ministry.

Friends, we were never meant to walk alone. And it’s not enough to give a quick hug between church services, or wave to one another from across the parking lot. We were meant for so much more.

God intended for us to be closely connected.

Love you, Sisters!

*What do you think is essential for deep friendships? How have you been able to find friends in this swirling world we live in?

In His grace,
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(This post may contain affiliate links. Read my full disclosure.)

100 Ways to Love eBooks TinyOur books are now available:  100 Ways to Love Your Husband by Lisa Jacobson and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife by Matthew L. Jacobson

If you would like these posts delivered directly to your inbox, simply subscribe below (and get the FREE eBook, The 7 Habits of a Highly Fulfilling Marriage).