The Four Kinds of Love Every Thriving Marriage Needs

Every thriving marriage needs love, but what does that really look like and can you have it?

My husband often introduces me as his girlfriend.

Ever-so-slightly embarrassing.

He’ll say it to the barista at Starbucks or the cashier in the check-out line of the grocery store. Even to the new couple, we met at the end-of-the-year barbeque.

After 26 years, you’d think I’d get used to it, but it still makes me blush.

And smile.

I always hurry to add that I also happen to be his wife –an important fact to establish when you have eight children together.

And I’ll flash my wedding ring to prove it if necessary.

I think he gets some odd gratification out of my embarrassment.

Then pretends to protest, “What . . . you are my girlfriend, aren’t you?”

Yes, well . . .

It’s true: I am a girl. And I am his friend.  A close friend.

The best of friends, really.

So I guess that does make me his girlfriend.

And like most good friendships, ours has grown over time. We’ve had to invest in our friendship and look after it.

The Four Kinds of Love Every Thriving Marriage Needs

This kind of love is called phileo in the Greek—the kind of love found within close friendships. It’s that generous and affectionate love that cares most about making the other person happy.

But did you know that the Bible speaks of four different kinds of love? And that there’s a specific word in the Greek for each one: Eros for romantic love,  Storge for family love, Philia (or Phileo) for brotherly love, and Agape for everlasting and sacrificial love. A growing, healthy marriage needs each one.

Are you building up your marriage with these different kinds of love?

Or could your marriage (or someone you know) use a refresher on how to express the 4 different kinds of love spoken of in the Bible?

The FAITHFUL LIFE Podcast Is Back

Exciting news!! Matt and I have returned to the FAITHFUL LIFE podcast and are very happy to be back! Thank you to every who has expressed such kind enthusiasm and offered such warm encouragement. We’re grateful to you.

We’ve already recorded three NEW episodes – and those are available on any podcast platform – but here’s the one I’m sharing with you today.

We invite you to join us on the FAITHFUL LIFE podcast HERE or press “play” below!


Matt and Lisa Jacobson, authors of 100 Ways to Love Your Husband and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife, are the hosts of a weekly podcast to talk about what it means to be a biblical Christian in marriage, parenting, church, and culture. Matt and Lisa offer deep encouragement, along with practical steps and true-life stories, as we grow in walking the faithful life together.

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A 52-Week Devotional for the Deeper, Richer Marriage You Desire

An intimate, loving marriage is so much closer than you think

Imagine if, at the end of the year, despite your busy schedules and all the demands on your time and attention, you and your husband were more in sync, more connected, and more in love than ever before. Sounds amazing, right?

That kind of marriage is what is waiting for you as you read through the fifty-two weekly devotions in Loving Your Husband Well. Each entry includes a specific theme, related Scripture, a powerful devotion, thoughts for further reflection, practical ideas, and a prayer, all designed to help you love, cherish, and serve the man who shares life’s journey with you.

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