He Calls Us Daughters
We are daughters of God before being moms or wives, though they are vital parts of who we are. Our identity is in Him first.
“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works,
which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”
Ephesians 2:10 ESV
“Foster mom.” It’s a title so unique and so defining that it’s at risk of becoming the thing by which I most identify myself. Much of my time and focus are spent on visits and behaviors and workers and biological parents. Even between placements, there’s still the web of family connections, the stinging losses, the stress of waiting for calls, or the anguish of saying no to them.
Ask me to define myself in two words, and I’d be tempted to say “foster mom.” But I’d be wrong. The best definition takes only one word: daughter.
As a child of God, nothing that I do is the most important thing about me. And foster parenting is something that I do. It is not who I am. When I put my actions before my identity, I am building on a changeable, faulty foundation. Right now, I am wife to Alan and mom to Liv, Wes, Bella, Em, Jax, and Dillon. And not to be morbid, but even this most important part of what I do with my life could be taken from me in an instant.
God’s Love Never Changes
The only completely constant, unchangeable and unchanging, irremovable and unflinching part of me? That I am His daughter. And this is what is most reliable about me. Why? Because it is based on Him and not on me. He is constant. His grace is unchangeable and His mercy is unchanging. His adoption of me is irremovable and His love for me is unflinching.
Who I am is, simply put, based on who He is rather than who I am.
Ephesians 2:10 reminds us that we were created to do good works. But you simply cannot consider the meaning of Ephesians 2:10 without the rich verses that precede and define and inform it:
“And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience—among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved.” (Eph. 2:1–6 ESV, emphasis mine)
Daughters Saved by Grace
We were created and commissioned by God to do things for Him and for others that are so eternal, they were prepared before we were even born. This is big news.
The full gospel message of this passage is absolutely crucial to the “good works” battle cry we pull from it. We must guard against putting the proverbial foster-care-mission cart before the saved-by-grace-alone horse.
Foster care is a mission for me (and maybe you, too)—a grand and glorious, eternal mission. Spending up your days loving and serving the people involved in it is good, good work. And good works are important—we were created to do them! But our good works, whatever they are, must proceed from what precedes them. Namely, our identity in Him. Our works are not what define us, not what identify us, and they never save us. The saving work is His, and it’s only ever “the gift of God, not a result of works” (vv. 8–9 ESV).
You are called to do for Him, but first and foremost, you are His daughter.
In His Word
Read 2 Corinthians 5. In verses 14 and 15, do you notice how Jesus died for everyone (regardless of their good works)? Praise God that in Him we are new creations who live by faith!
In Your Life
How strongly do you identify with the title daughter when thinking about your relationship with God? Take a moment today to write a few sentences about your relationship with God and how you can draw closer to Him.
We Recommend
We recommend the devotional Filled: 60 Devotions for the Foster Parent’s Heart by Jamie Finn. Though this is a devotional written specifically for foster parents, we love the universal truths it contains. Jamie leads you to refresh and refill yourself with God’s Word each day to give you strength for the day to come.
Let’s Connect
Jamie C. Finn (FosterTheFamilyBlog.com) is the author of Foster the Family, founder and president of Foster the Family, host of the Real Mom podcast, founder and owner of Goods and Better, and a sought-after speaker for retreats, conferences, and events for foster and adoptive parents. Her popular social media accounts offer a glimpse into the real life of a foster parent and provide encouragement to thousands of foster parents. Jamie is the mother to 6+ children through foster care, adoption, and birth. She lives in New Jersey with her husband, Alan.