How to Build a Sweet Marriage

Pleasant words are like a honeycomb,
Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones~ Proverbs 16:24 (NKJV)

I could see it was starting to take a toll on him.

Not just him, but on me too.

Both Matt and I have been walking through more heartache and loss than we’ve ever experienced before.

And it was beginning to show.

I could hear it in his voice and watch it in the way he walked.

Everything said heavy. And hard.

But he wasn’t the only one impacted here. So I was very tempted to shout at him, “Can’t you see that I’m hurting too? What about me??”

Except I remembered a friend of mine who used to tell this (true) story of how her husband would say to her, “Talk sweet to me, Nancy,” when she’d get all worked up like that.

Talk sweet to me.

And that’s the phrase that kept going around in my head.

So I decided not to shout and tried sweet instead.

I placed a gentle hand on the back of his neck and thanked him for making the coffee.

I determined to soften my voice and say the nicer things I could think of.

Later whispered in his ear that he was a good man and – no matter what we were going through – I was so very glad I married him.Sweet Marriage

Something Healing

Now friend, don’t go thinking all “oh great, a saint” on me here.

Because I’m not saying it was easy, or that it came naturally.

I’m just saying that I made myself do it.

And since we’ve come this far, I might as well tell you the rest.

It really did make a difference.

Something healing happened there.

That sweet talk had a far greater impact on him – and our relationship – than I could’ve guessed.

A Sweet Marriage

I don’t know where you’re at in your own relationship. Maybe things are going splendid and couldn’t be better. But maybe…maybe the stress and strain have been wearing on you two, as well.

While you can read all kinds of articles and listen to podcasts on the topic, I’d encourage you to start with the wisdom the Bible offers.

Begin with pleasant words (Prov. 16:24). Then be sure to encourage one another and build one another up (I Thess. 5:7).

And yes, it “goes both ways.” But it has to start with someone, right?

So why not have it start with you.

Talk sweet to him, sister.

Because it’s sweetness to the soul and health to the bones.

And, in my experience, surprisingly healing and helpful in your marriage.

In His Word

Pleasant words are like a honeycomb,
Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones~ Proverbs 16:24 (NKJV)

Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing. ~ I Thessalonians 5:7 (ESV)

In Your Life

How about trying this simple 5-Day Sweet Challenge where every day you think of one nice thing you can intentionally say to your husband? Don’t tell him what you’re doing, but make sure the day doesn’t end without communicating that kind word you’ve planned to tell him. Observe what kind of impact it has—not only on him and your relationship, but on you too.

We Recommend

Discover the powerful ways you can build one another up in love with the words that you choose to say every day. 100 Words of Affirmation Every Husband Needs to Hear (and 100 Words of Affirmation Your Wife Needs to Hear) offers 100 things to say to your husband that deeply encourage, affirm, and inspire.

Lisa and her husband, Matt, also cohost FAITHFUL LIFE, a weekly podcast focusing on what it means to be a biblical Christian in marriage, parenting, church, and culture.

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