What To Do When You’ve Become the Grumpy Mom

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I love watching people react to the title of my new book on motherhood: Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday. They chuckle, nudge their friend and deep down, don’t take offense because they know it happens to all of us. We get grumpy.

Grumpy doesn’t mean walking around with a scowl on a face all day long. It can, of course, but it may just be that subtle discontent that can settle in as we clean crumbs on the same floor we were on our knees cleaning just one day earlier. It may just be falling into bed feeling exhausted and a little hopeless that the next day will be any better.

We see these things as just a part of motherhood. And while it’s true, there will likely always be crumbs, sleepless nights and cold coffee, God promises us so much more!

Fight for Joy

And me? Well, I was just half glass empty enough to find it. That’s right. I’m not positive Polly. I didn’t set out to help moms find renewed joy in motherhood because it came easy to me or it’s my natural bent. I found it because I had to start fighting for it. The littlest things kept sinking me, and God was gracious enough to open my eyes to the things that were causing it when I desperately tried to search it out.

Behind the stereotypes that flooded my ears, my social media feeds and even escaped my own mouth were planting seeds of discontent. They felt innocent. They felt like unity. They felt like grin-and-bear-it survival, like if I could laugh about it, it somehow didn’t seem to be as hopeless.

A Trail of Thinking

It seems crazy that talking about cold coffee or never showering can stir up grumpiness but here’s the thought trail for me:

In a crowd, I blame a busy toddler for hair that goes unwashed for days.
In my heart, I start to believe the lie that I’m the victim that never gets the “me time” I deserve.

In a crowd, I talk about needing chocolate to get through an epic toddler meltdown.
In my heart, I’m believing the lie that chocolate will satisfy, and when it doesn’t? Grumpy Mom shows up.

In a crowd, I say no to volunteering, a new job, a mentoring opportunity because I’m too busy.
In my heart, I believe the lie that I’m too busy when really, I’m just afraid and never asked God’s opinion on the matter.

Abundance in Motherhood

It’s easy to entertain the world’s definition of motherhood because we are literally surrounded by it.

That’s why Paul tells us in Romans 12:2 (ESV) to

“…  not be conformed to this world,^[a] but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect”

This is where abundance in motherhood is. This is the hope we have. This is what can squash our discontent. This is was can bury our frustrations about missed nap times and consistently dirty walls.

The command to think differently than the world.

In our current time, the world wants to convince us that motherhood is yoga pants, wine as mommy’s pacifier, never having an uninterrupted conversation with our spouse again and constant exhaustion.

I truly believe that a renewed joy in motherhood is closer than we think and starts with one simple thought: an awareness that every thought we hear about motherhood requires are discernment. It should be challenged. Not in an aggressive, always on an ugly defense but instead, the willingness to hold thoughts up to the world of God and ask “God is this what you say about motherhood or is a pattern of the world I need to reject?”

Transformative Thinking

I think that awareness will lead to transformed thinking and a spark in our hearts that replace those seeds of discontent we didn’t realize were sneaking in.

Though Romans 12:2 has been an anthem of sorts for Grumpy Mom Takes a Holiday, I am just realizing the significance of that last line. I love the NLT version which says

“Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.”

God’s will is revealed as we start rejecting the lies from the world. And that will, my sweet momma-friends knee deep in every hard thing the world dwells on, is STILL good and pleasing and perfect!

If you’re a mom who has ever struggled with getting grumpy with your kids (quite possibly all of us!), then you’re going to be encouraged and inspired by Valerie Woerner in Grumpy Mom Takes A Holiday. While she can relate to the very real challenges of motherhood, she also offers hope and actions steps to help you find peace and joy in your amazing role as mom.  ~ Lisa Jacobson, Club31Women.com

This just-released new and encouraging book, Grumpy Mom Takes A Holiday is available—>HERE

Valerie Woerner is the author of Grumpy Mom Takes Holiday and owner of Val Marie Paper. Her mission is to help every momma experience the joy she never knew was even possible until God revealed it. You’ll find her hanging out on Instagram or her blog talking about prayer, motherhood, margin and her favorite current read. She’s lives in Lafayette, Louisiana with her husband Tyler and two girls, Vivi and Vana.