Learning to Fight FOR Your Teens Instead of Against Them

Learn how to fight for your teens in prayer, not against them—discover purpose, peace, and the power of partnering with God in parenting.

One thing I know about having children who are out on their own, or are about to be, is that the way we parent changes, and that brings with it all kinds of emotions . . . good and bad. The teenage years are an emotional roller coaster. They can bring many opportunities for sin, negative experiences in friendships, and challenges to our efforts to help our children follow God and view the world through the lens of His Word.

Teens face temptations today that their parents never had to face, at least not in the same way, and this can cause some parents to shut down and take a hands-off approach, feeling a sense of loss and lack of purpose.

Our Purpose Remains the Same

Yes, things change. But while our role might have changed, our purpose has not. Not if we know what our real in-Christ purpose is as a mom.

What if there were a way to learn to fight for our teenagers instead of against them? What if there was a way to partner with God for the hearts of our children that has nothing to do with managing them, correcting them, or trying to force them into a mold of our making, but instead releases them to the good plans of their sovereign God, all the while helping Mom learn to walk in her constantly changing role with peace?

What if we could find the wisdom we need each day to help them through the challenging teenage years, and feel purposeful instead of powerless in our motherhood plan?

What if we could feel empowered by our ability to go to God’s Word, because it has the power to change their hearts, and we trust it to do exactly what God purposes for them?

What if we could release our need to control, and choose to protect with our prayers instead?

Could there be a way for us to unlock the power of the prayer partnership God offers in our parenting so we can act with confidence on a regular basis?

This is the power of fighting for our teenagers in prayer.

But how do we do it? I think we first have to understand what prayer is and is not.

What Is Prayer?

The simplest, most basic definition of prayer is conversation with God. God has invited each of us into a holy and divine partnership, where we share our hearts, fears, worries, confusion, and requests, and He gives us His wisdom, comfort, truth, love, and guidance in return. It isn’t necessarily a fair partnership. He is still God and therefore has the right to tell us yes, no, or wait, but we get the most out of it by far. To think that we have the God of the Universe, who created the hearts of our children, opening His arms in invitation to us, saying, “Seek wisdom here!” is powerful, and I don’t want us to miss it. 

I believe prayer is proactive. I believe it is action. A verb. It is doing something. Maybe the most important something we can do. If prayer were not action, it would be nothing. It would accomplish nothing. Do nothing. Mean nothing. And be worth nothing. Prayer is not passive. It is not a last resort. It is not a cop-out, an excuse, or a way to keep our hands from getting dirty. Prayer is the first and best response of the Christian parent to the challenges her children will face in this world, because she serves the God who can, does, and reigns.

Prayer is battle.
Prayer is war.
Prayer is action.

Prayer is fighting FOR our children.

Reflection: 

How are you praying for your teens, your children, or teens in your life? How often do you have a conversation with God about your teens?

If you’ve enjoyed this post, check out the books Praying for Teen Girls: Partner with God for the Heart of Your Daughter by Stacey Thacker and Praying for Teen Boys: Partner with God for the Heart of Your Son by Brooke McGlothlin. We love how Brooke and Stacey come alongside teens and their parents to help parents navigate the teen years with over 90 scriptural prayers.

Brooke McGlothlin is the founder of Million Praying Moms and hosts the Everyday Prayers with Million Praying Moms podcast, with over 330,000 downloads. She is the author of eight books, three of which were ECPA bestsellers, and has been a featured blogger at LifeWay’s ParentLife blog, the Proverbs 31 devotional site, and Ann Voskamp’s A Holy Experience. A popular conference speaker and media guest, she’s made multiple appearances on Focus on the Family Radio Show and FamilyLife Today. Brooke lives in the mountains of southwest Virginia with her husband and their two sons. Learn more at MillionPrayingMoms.com.

Stacey Thacker has long served women and girls in ministry. A respected prayer mentor and Bible teacher, she is the author of nine books, as well as a popular conference speaker, ministry director, and founder of Stacey Thacker Creative, where she works with top-selling authors and creatives. She lives in Orlando, Florida, with her husband and four daughters. Learn more at StaceyThacker.com.