Supporting your husband will be easy at times and much more difficult at other times. You can strengthen your marriage by being supportive.
Recently my husband asked how I felt about him applying to a 2-year program that would disciple him in his God-given identity and equip him to extend the love of Jesus in his day-to-day life. Sounds pretty basic right? You’d be surprised at how few of us actually live this abundant life.
It’s the equivalent of going back to college so it would take up a lot of his free time to read and study. My husband has been learning more about his identity in Christ for the past couple of years and it is the main reason our marriage has survived. Absolutely I would support him! (And by the way, he was accepted for the 2024-2025 school year!)
Many times, when we engage with the Bible or an article, we tend to focus on others rather than ourselves. Instead of reflecting on how we can improve, our attention often shifts to why someone else’s challenges are not being discussed, or we identify precisely who should be reading that particular scripture verse.
A challenge: As you read this, don’t twist it up and make it about you. Step outside yourself and your needs momentarily and truly put your husband first.
Before you can wholeheartedly support your husband, you need to make sure your heart is in the right place. Your heart needs to be a heart for Jesus first. Do you love Him enough to love what He loves? Are you committed enough to Him enough to trust His Word? Do you love Him enough to walk in obedience? It’s not an accusation; it’s an honest question that only you can answer.
“If you love me, you will keep my commands.” (John 14:15).
He didn’t say this as a manipulative tactic but as a fact. The fact is, when you love Jesus, you’ll want to do what He asks of you.
Supporting your husband is an everyday commitment. It could be for a dream or goal he has, or it could be helping him get through a rough day at work with words of comfort. Words of encouragement and prayers lifted up are not in vain.
Satan loves to pit us against our spouses. It’s one of the biggest tactics he uses to cause division. We need to recognize his schemes for what they are and remember we are not fighting against flesh and blood, but against the powers of this dark world and spiritual forces of evil (Ephesians 6:12).
Here are 3 reasons why being supportive of your husband makes your marriage stronger:
It’s a Practical Demonstration of Love
Love is defined in 1 Corinthians 13 as being patient, kind, and not self-seeking, among other beautiful qualities. Supporting your husband in his decision-making or a dream he may hold can strengthen your love bond. Being in unity is a quality God desires of us, not only as a couple but as His children, too. Imagine how you could empower your husband by believing in him.
It Helps You Grow Together
When spouses support each other, it brings them closer together. You should be his biggest fan; his loudest cheerleader; his strongest prayer warrior. He is your life partner and one flesh. What affects him also affects you and vice versa. When you fight together, you win together. When you fight against each other, you both lose.
It Shows Honor to God
Supporting your husband helps you trust God and His design for marriage. Yes, we absolutely live in a fallen world and not everything will automatically be the way God originally intended it. But His Word gives us all we need to walk toward that design with Him. We cannot seek fallen men to help us with our fallen problems. Only our Holy God can lead us down the road he paved for marriage. Only He will give us the purpose He intended for a strong, healthy, and holy marriage.
It’s been some time since I’ve been able to write about marriage from a place of love and not pain. My husband and I have walked a hard road that we are now on the other side of. The only reason this was possible was because we followed the Lord’s leading. We allowed God to work in us individually while supporting each other’s journey. Now we’re able to work on our marriage together and continue supporting each other’s personal relationships with God.
Maybe your husband has a tough decision ahead and while you may have ideas of what the best option is, choose to support him with the decision he makes. He will need you.
You can’t control what your husband does or doesn’t do. But you do have control over your own thoughts and actions. When you seek God first, it all lands where it should. Walking with Jesus isn’t always easy because we walk against the grain of the world. We are called to do pretty much the opposite of what the world does. That’s why it’s so important we remain in community with one another so we don’t need to walk that road alone.
Supporting your husband is the loving thing Christ has called us to do, even when it’s hard. And you’re not alone.
*Disclaimer: not all marriage advice is suitable for those in destructive marriages. Please seek the Lord and trusted godly counsel for your particular situation.
A 52-Week Devotional for the Deeper, Richer Marriage You Desire
An intimate, loving marriage is so much closer than you think
Imagine if, at the end of the year, despite your busy schedules and all the demands on your time and attention, you and your husband were more in sync, more connected, and more in love than ever before. Sounds amazing, right?
That kind of marriage is what is waiting for you as you read through the fifty-two weekly devotions in Loving Your Husband Well. Each entry includes a specific theme, related Scripture, a powerful devotion, thoughts for further reflection, practical ideas, and a prayer, all designed to help you love, cherish, and serve the man who shares life’s journey with you.